Write Where I Am

A Hero's Cape

2009-02-17T14:37:00.000-06:00

G.I. Joes, Operation, a sword, and a Walkie Talkie lay abandoned amidst the mounds of crumpled wrapping paper, twinkling with the reflection of the Christmas tree lights. Even the sweet scent of baking cinnamon rolls couldn’t divert Brandon’s attention from the Superman cape he opened in his last present. Had she known how difficult it would be to get the red cape off of his back for even a washing, his mother may have rethought the gift. But as his eyes shined with delight, she gave in to his begging and smoothed the soft felt cape around his narrow shoulders, still covered in Snoopy pajamas.
Her little superhero and his cape built forts, set up traps to trip his older brother, and even tied his best friend to a yellow, Big Bird chair trying to find out enemy secrets. One day, while washing the front window, his mother heard an ear-splitting scream followed immediately by a chubby little girl, with her roly-poly legs bouncing her across the window. Her Barbie backpack pounded against her back and her blonde pigtails did jumping jacks as she sprinted from the unidentified chaser.
It didn’t take long for the telling cape to make its appearance in hot pursuit of today’s enemy. As she looked closer, in his out-stretched arm she saw the silver glint of his plastic knife. Knowing the little girl would have seen this as a real threat, she threw down the soapy rag and stormed outside, screaming for superman to stop.
Chin lowered, he shuffled his way back to his mother’s side, while being chastised for chasing the innocent little girl. “But mom,” he stammered, as big droplets of tears formed in the corners of his chocolate eyes, “Yesterday, she cried as she passed the neighbor’s house because of the barking dog, so I followed her today to protect her.” Sometimes, even heroes in a cape are misunderstood.

Tired

2009-01-28T19:42:00.002-06:00

So...I'm back in school. Round #3. Am I crazy or what? This is only my second week of classes, and I'm already really tired! Last semester I had a ball. Loved my classes and it was still new and "fun." Now...reality has come pouring down and I'm tired. Did I say I was tired? If everything works out correctly...I will be done in December...so that rocks! Then on to round #4...or maybe not. :-)

Papers, more papers, exams, books to read, and presentations to give...I better get back to it!

My Rant

2009-01-22T13:40:00.000-06:00

It’s my blog, I can rant if I want to. I am embarrassed and ashamed of how Americans have treated George W. Bush, not only for the last four years, but especially for the treatment at Obama’s inauguration. And I won’t even discuss defacing of a monument. Perhaps people need to take a lesson from their six year old child who is learning the benefits of good sportsmanship at his t-ball game. 43 was our PRESIDENT. If anyone thinks they knew a fraction of what that man did about our safety and state of country, then you should go work for the NY Times. I want to thank the man who RESPECTED the position he was given and the office he held, and made the tough decisions to keep us safe, while darts were thrown at his back. When our new President said it is “Time to set aside childish things,” I’m sure he was talking about the behavior of those in front of him.

1 Timothy 2:1-4 (New International Version)
1I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone— 2for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. 3This is good, and pleases God our Savior, 4who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-24T14:12:00.003-06:00

I pray we will all stop the cooking, cleaning, shopping, wrapping presents, and staring glassy-eyed at the decorations we've put up but have yet to enjoy, and truly THANK our God for giving us the best He had to offer, and more than we ever deserved...his Son. May all our Christmas Eves be spent pondering the anticipation of the angels who heralded our King's birth and the wisdom of the Magi as they searched and ultimately found Him. And may we sing our carols, eat our turkey, and open our presents with our hearts bursting with the love, thankfulness, and grace our Savior has bestowed on us.

Merry Christmas! Be blessed.

Let Freedom Ring

2008-10-15T22:39:00.002-05:00

Lately, a few of my non-Christian friends have made comments saying that to become a follower of Jesus, you have to give up all the fun things of the world...that there is a strict set of rules we must follow and that we are never allowed to sin again. (Darn Pharisees still bugging us! ;-) )

The truth is that Jesus sets us free. Free from the bondage of sin. We are no longer under the constraints of evil and actually have the necessary power to be victors. Jesus wants us to come to Him exactly as we are, issues and all. His time on earth was spent with “sinners, sluts, and liars,” not the religious, upright, or uptight. Jesus’ blood set us free from the old rules. It becomes about a relationship with the only one who truly understands us.

We are still human and every day we walk this earth we will make mistakes and have our vices to handle. But we no longer walk alone, and are covered by the undeserved grace and mercy of our Lord. Yes, we are held to a higher standard than the rest of the world. Every day we will be shaped and molded into a better version of ourselves, the person who we were created to be, more like our Jesus.

Yea's & Boo's

2008-05-02T17:32:00.001-05:00

I don’t have much of importance to say. Other than I am so happy Grey’s Anatomy is finally showing new episodes and 27 Dresses is finally out on DVD. Yea!

Oh, and I’m stuck inside the house tonight while we get our new furnace and air conditioner installed. Yea for upgraded machines – boo for a boring Friday night!

Football and a Prayer

2008-04-28T20:40:00.000-05:00

Indoor football is a new experience for me. The field is about a fourth the size of a regular football field, yet they play the game basically the same. At our local games, the Kansas Koyotes, if a football gets thrown into the stands, you can keep it. If it is kicked into the stands, you are asked to return it. At the game on Saturday, I took someone with me, who shall remain nameless, and she became obsessed with getting a football. Arms outstretched and waiving at the quarterbacks to throw to her, as opposed to their own wide receivers, maniacal scaling of rows of seats to try and chase down a ball, begging and pleading with lucky recipients for them to have mercy on her and give up their bounty. All for naught, but two hours of pouting. In her one-mindedness she could no longer enjoy the game. Her disappointment overshadowed any joy in the victory or thrill of an amazing play. I wonder if I am the same way...praying so hard for one particular thing, that I fail to find the joy in the moment or the other blessings lining my life.

Addictions

2008-04-11T17:49:00.000-05:00

My day job has cracked down on internet usage. I won't go into details or even give my thoughts on the matter, but I will say this...I'm having serious withdrawals! How is one supposed to know what's going on in the world? Newspapers...what are those? And I used the phone book for the first time in years today! Talk about slowing me down. ;-) If we're trying to relive the 80s, can someone tell me now so I can buy Aquanet stock?!?

Scorched

2008-03-27T18:25:00.001-05:00

Wandering through the desert is tough. Especially when you've been circling the same mountain for years. Sound familiar? I find myself complaining too much, and shudder when remembering God's answer to the Israelite complaints about a meat-less, wilderness diet. Angry, He poured down fire and destroyed the edges of the camp, and Moses had to pray for it to stop. What fires would be extinguished in my life if I had thankfulness and praise on the tip of my tongue instead? Psalm 32:8: "The Lord says, 'I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.'" Do you trust God enough to believe your desert trek is the best path for you?

3 Not-So-Blind Mice

2008-03-20T18:12:00.001-05:00

I work on the garden level of a beautiful, old museum. Well, it's all offices now, but it used to house artifacts older than our laptops. :-) For weeks, we have spotted evidence of mice throughout the basement. Being the "city" girl I am, I don't take too kindly to animals using my files as their restroom (not to mention the diseases), so I've made it a personal mission to help these vermin find a new home (hopefully in the dumpster). For three weeks these mice have avoided every sticky and bait trap the exterminators and building maintenance crew members have laid out. So I brought in reinforcements...snapping traps with crunchy peanut butter and cheese (yes, I googled this issue and this was the overwhelming solution)! These mice definitely aren't blind as the only thing trapped so far is a bit of air! I think God knew what he was doing when he moved my parents into town before I was born!

Giddyup!

2008-03-19T20:23:00.002-05:00

Horses were created to run in herds, manes tangling in the wind, but with a little love and guidance these beasts morph into pets capable of winning races, pulling loads, or transporting their master. Their majestic power is bridled into submission with only a small piece of leather. I took riding lessons a few years ago and was intimidated by their power and strength, awed by their patience, and overwhelmed with love. Mesmerized by every horse, I love to capture unique pictures of them, whether at rest or play. Sometimes I wonder if that is how our God looks at us...and it makes me wonder what my bridle is?

Off Sabbatical

2008-03-18T19:32:00.002-05:00

That was the longest, unintentional sabbatical I have ever taken! Sometimes life gets in the way. But I'm back. No, really, I am. At least for this week. So for all 2 of my faithful readers, read on.

And just for fun, can you find the gator? ;-)

Working 9 to 5...

2007-07-02T18:25:00.001-05:00

Well, I finally downloaded a few pix from my camera. This is me in the studio recording the audio version of my book. I think I found my new calling!! Put a mic in front of my mouth, and I'm bound to have fun! :)

Book Release Parteeeee

2007-06-08T20:45:00.001-05:00

YOU (yes, you) are invited to my book release party and book signing at Christian Book & Gift Store (Fairlawn Plaza).

2 - 4 pm -- tomorrow, June 9.

Come on over...I'd love to see you there!

LIVE in 5, 4, 3...

2007-05-30T21:37:00.001-05:00

Tune into KSNT Channel 27 at 11:00ish tomorrow morning and you'll see me doing my first live book interview!!

Been Awhile...

2007-05-21T19:51:00.000-05:00

A LONG while. Yikes, where to begin? How about with some pictures?

Here is a picture of my March of Dimes event in Atlanta...reading to some beautiful kiddos...oh, and I had a blast seeing old friends and visiting my old haunts. Thanks to my dear friend, Lisa, for letting us invade her living quarters! :-)

And a bonus picture of Jamaica. Wow...

First Booked Event!

2007-02-08T21:46:00.000-06:00

Mark your calendars...especially all you folks from Hotlanta! I will be reading my book, But, God! to children (and anyone I can bribe to attend) at this race. So even if you aren't racing, come on out and see me! :)

--Gwinnett WalkAmerica is Saturday, April 28, 2007 at Holiday Pavilion at Lake Lanier. Registration begins at 9:00 a.m.--

See you there!

Check out my Book Cover!!

2007-01-27T14:49:00.000-06:00

Say Cheese!

2007-01-26T22:45:00.000-06:00

This weekend is my author picture photo shoot (for the back of my book). We had to move it to Sunday morning, so I am on my own for hair and makeup. I doubt my typical wash-and-wear look will be appropriate, so I must experiment. Cute hats, anyone?

I’ve heard it’s best to not look too different from your every day appearance, as you don’t want to surprise “fans” at book signings. Ha…PHOTO SHOP, BABY!

Perhaps I’ll post a few on here next week...after I learn how to photoshop in a golden tan! :)

Get Organized...or Not!

2007-01-24T22:25:00.000-06:00

Okay, so my bedroom is a disaster. I admit it. Occasionally, I will sift through the clothes and clutter and narrow down to a more manageable level. But right now, I’m starting to look like a tornado victim. So when we had a professional organizer come to work, I readily signed up for the class. Perfect timing, considering I will be merging my bedroom and office…SOON!

When she asked for volunteers to give their reason for attending the class, my hand shot up in a way it hadn’t since I was working to secure teacher’s pet status in the second grade. No way would I pass up this chance to get free personalized organizational advice! A behind-numbing hour later, she finally addressed my issue.

Her advice: “Don’t.”

Brilliant.

How Much Is Too Much?

2007-01-12T21:30:00.000-06:00

When does being “real” turn creepy? For example, I can spill my guts on this cyberjournal in an attempt to be authentic and honest in the hopes that somewhere along the line someone will be encouraged, helped, or even entertained. But more realistically, random people will come across this page, read intimate details of my life and feel like they know me, and therefore can judge me on whatever issue I choose to reveal, all before having a real conversation.

As a writer it’s easy to get carried away when describing emotions and scenarios. If it’s fiction, it makes it all the more entertaining, but when it’s an autobiography, be prepared for a level of judgment.

Growing up in small town USA and living in a glass hill-top house thickened my skin, but there will always be a small part of me that still cares what other people think. But, in truth, I have a responsibility. Not to myself or to you, but to my God. And I believe He wants authenticity. What’s the point in hiding our weaknesses or failures? Does it make us weaker to admit our issues? Or does it take courage to stand up and admit we aren’t perfect? The only one who truly matters knew what we’d do long before we were even here. We can’t hide our emotions in some chamber of our heart and hope God doesn’t look there. But maybe there is an arbitrary line we should draw when posting in blog world. Wherever it resides…just know that what I post, is this sinner’s truth (in all its glorious creepiness).

"Do you think I am trying to make people accept me? No, God is the One I am trying to please. Am I trying to please people? If I still wanted to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." (Galatians 1:10)

New Year, New Start

2007-01-06T10:57:00.000-06:00

I spent the final weeks of 2006 yucky sick and the beginning of 2007 trying to recover. Despite the nagging weakness, I am extraordinarily excited about this coming year. I love starting new and fresh and having a entire year of blessings and challenges to look forward to. 2006 was a year of many changes and growth for me and a definite turning point in my life. I never want to stop growing and changing, but I am hoping many of the growing pains have been sufficiently dealt with. :)

I pray this coming year is extremely blessed and every day we will see what our God is doing in our lives. May we all find more of Him.

Here's to a great year!!

Christmas Prayer

2006-12-24T22:48:00.000-06:00

I hope you all have a blessed and very Merry Christmas.

My prayer for you:

God, we love you. On this day of your son’s mortal birth, help us not to lose sight of the real reason for this holiday, and let us experience a morsel of the joy and expectation the heaven’s felt when Jesus shed his glory and came quietly to this dark earth to save us.

As we go through the rituals and everyday busyness of this season, help us remember that it was a simple innkeeper’s busyness that caused him to miss out on the greatest birth of all time.

Instead of dreaming about mere toys and games, let us remember the magi’s long journey and their gifts to you. May we be as wise and follow after The Good Shepherd every day of our lives.

As we lay down to sleep in our comfortable beds tonight, let us remember our King of King’s first night wrapped in rags sleeping in a feed trough.

As we feast together, let us reverently remember our Deliverer’s last supper and prepare for the bridal feast yet to come.

As we sing Christmas carols, let our hearts rejoice in the presence of our High Priest.
As we worry over temporary and worldly things, let us remember the sacrifice Immanuel made for our eternal salvation.

How truly blessed we are to know how this nativity story ends, but on this day, bring the painted, plastic characters to life and out of the miniature stable and help us to see the integral parts they played in the miracle you created.

Help us to remember Jesus not only as a baby, but every miracle he performed, every life he touched, every man he loved, and every soul he saved. Truly there is no better God to serve. We don’t deserve your unlimited grace and mercy, but we thank you that you are love, unchanging in your goodness, and holy beyond belief. As the New Year commences, I pray our hearts would be softened to your truth, and that we would come to know your voice as our Shepherd and follow in obedience so we too can take part in your masterfully crafted plan for our lives.

God, today we remember you and all you give us daily. Thank you for the best gift of all – your son. May this day glorify only you. In our holy Savior’s name we pray. Amen.

Waiting...

2006-12-10T23:43:00.000-06:00

Waiting…patiently…on God. Difficult…humbling…worthwhile.

Perfect submission, all is at rest,
I in my Savior am happy and blest;
Watching and waiting, looking above,
Filled with His goodness, lost in His love.
~Crosby

The Loss of a Presence

2006-12-03T15:01:00.000-06:00

Though I didn’t see her every day
Or even think about her but occasionally
The loss of her presence sneaks up on me
In the hours I never expected

Somewhere, someone else is mourning her
And will until she is gone too
The cycle continually flows, rarely ebbing
Until the day of redemption

When all the promises foretold
Everything we faithfully hoped for
Comes to fruition and victory is here
Hearts are mended, presences reunited

Until then, sorrow will unexpectedly pierce
And what can I do
But call the comforter
And receive His merciful relief

Thanksgiving

2006-11-22T22:40:00.000-06:00

My favorite holiday.
No presents.
No work.
Time with family.
Yummy food.
Good sale ads. :)

I pray everyone would take a few moments tomorrow to thank God for all of the wonderful blessings in our lives...the little stuff we rarely think about and the big stuff we take for granted. May it be a safe and beautiful day for everyone.

And gobble up some turkey!

Raining Babies & Blankets

2006-11-17T20:18:00.000-06:00

During the past month, there has been a great influx of American citizens. No, not from Mexico. Newborns!

I just wanted to give a warm welcome in this cold world to:
My cousin Kammi’s second
My friend Beth’s first
My friend Todd’s second
My friend Julie’s second
My friend JC’s first

Even though it's my blog, I won’t give out names...well, since they aren’t my kids. ;)

May you all grow in favor with man and God.

Boo at the Zoo

2006-10-31T22:03:00.000-06:00

Saturday, I took Angel and her little brother to Boo at the Zoo (trick-or-treating at the zoo). Gasp…this would be 2 trips in one year for me. Angel was a spider witch and her brother was Spiderman. . I wore an old dance team sweatshirt from college, so when Angel asked me what I was, I said I was a Dancing Blue. She bought it. :) They each received a ton of candy and had fun looking at the poor, caged animals. We even finally spotted the sloth! A special thanks to my friend from work, who was volunteering that day, for showing us around and fielding all of Angel’s questions. Your patience was muchly appreciated.

Now, of course, many religious folks do not celebrate this “pagan” holiday. My childhood Halloween thoughts: I get to wear whatever crazy outfit I want…spray paint my hair…wear makeup…walk around the town after dark with my friends…and get enough free candy for a continuous three-week stomach ache. Never once did I associate this day with any evil or satanistic thoughts or activities. Maybe it is okay to let kids be kids, to free their innocent creativity and dreams to be someone else for a day, and let them enjoy interacting with neighbors and eating too much sugar and chocolate. We should take every opportunity to infuse the darkness with light anyhow. Let’s at least wait until they are in their teens to inject them with our grown up bitterness and legalism.

Walk the Walk

2006-10-24T22:28:00.000-05:00

A large part of being a Christian is lip service. I say I believe in the Bible and that sinning is wrong. But do I live what I believe? Does every aspect of my life ooze righteousness, or do I just talk a good game, like the Chief’s defensive line?

As time and again I have felt let down by my closest friends and family members for not living up to their promises, I have decided to take a close look at myself. Sadly, no, I have not always lived up to my own expectations, maybe even lowering my standards at some points in my life. I’m sure everyone can attest to the same. But from now on, instead of judging anyone else’s poor decisions, I need to spend time making sure I am walking uprightly and keeping my mouth shut.

Let Freedom Ring

2006-10-23T18:09:00.000-05:00

Lately, a few of my non-Christian friends have made comments saying that to become a follower of Jesus, you have to give up all the fun things of the world. That there is a strict set of rules we must follow and that we are never allowed to sin again. (Darn Pharisees still bugging us!)

The truth is that Jesus sets us free. Free from the bondage of sin. We are no longer under the constraints of evil and actually have the necessary power to be victors. Jesus wants us exactly as we are right now, issues and all. His time on earth was spent with "thieves, sluts, and liars," not the religious, upright, or uptight. Jesus’ blood set us free from the old rules. It becomes all about love and a relationship with the only person who truly understands us anyhow. We are still human and everyday we walk this earth we will make mistakes and have our vices to deal with. But now, we no longer walk alone, and are covered by the undeserved grace and mercy of our Lord.

Yes, we are held to a higher standard than the rest of the world. Every day we will be tempted and we will be shaped and molded into a better person, how we were created, more like our Jesus.

2006-10-17T20:00:00.000-05:00

I'm a forgetful person. Actually, I'm very good at memorization, but when it comes to the details of life, I struggle remembering the date. My mind rarely shuts down and prefers to run at mach 800, like my brain is the narrator of my life. I come up with funny or brilliant dialogue that I wish my friends would say so we could engage in witty banter or I focus on a weird characteristic of a person and try to think of way to incorporate it in my writings. The only way such things as dropping off library books or loading the dishwasher gets done is if I have it on my list. I make daily, weekly, and long term lists to aid in my endeavor to live a normally productive life.

But one thing, I have neglected to put on my list was to use gift cards. They are always a popular gift, and one I enjoy receiving. But if it isn't to a bookstore, then it gets meticulously placed in my wallet, probably behind the expired coupons I've been meaning to use for over a month. Needless to say, when I cleaned out my wallet last week, I found a vast assortment of gift cards, which for the most part were still valid. The total amount was way more exciting than the random twenty I found in my coat pocket last year.

Well, I better run. I have to make it to dinner at Cracker Barrel before my card expires. :)

Trapped...

2006-10-12T21:58:00.000-05:00

Today, I feel trapped in the four walls of my office. It’s a nice office with plenty of room for at least two people, with even a couple of pictures hanging that allude to a “Quiet Walk” in the forest or an icy drive along a snow ridden country road. But with those and even a large window hinting at what lies beyond, I still feel as though life is passing me by, while I idly slave away in my dungeon. That by sitting in front of my computer for another four hours will rob me of the chance to enjoy not only one of the first cold days of the season, but of the experience of encountering God.

It’s not that God isn’t with me right now, but I can feel His presence when I am most vulnerable to the elements -- in the cleansing power of the wind, the bold colors and contrasts of sky, the tangible feel of the earth beneath my feet, and especially around the dangerous crashing of the waves in the endless ocean. There is nothing that compares to the experience of worshipping God and Him loving back on you. Nothing.

And it’s what I need. Now. Always.

Do as You Say Not as You Want

2006-10-11T22:33:00.000-05:00

I was going to regale you with a thrilling story about riding a motorcycle way too fast this past weekend. With the wind blowing through my long, luscious locks of chocolate brown hair, while cruising past grazing horses and green fields, I basked under a clear blue sky and felt like I should be on the cover of a risky romance novel. Perhaps Fabio should replace my dad in the driver’s seat, however. Oh, and remove that helmet, it really cramps the whole hair blowing scenario.

But since this is my blog, I have decided to vent for a moment. People, if you aren’t willing to follow through on obligations, DON’T commit. We all have to do things we don’t like or enjoy, but if you are just going to end up bailing at the last second and leave someone else in a bind, don’t say “yes” in the first place. It’s disrespectful and rude. And I am referring to both big and little commitments. Don’t tell me you are going to call and then don’t. Or don’t agree to help with a project and not follow through. At least give me the courtesy of giving an honest “no” up front. I’ll respect you for it and we’ll get along just fine.

Now go ride a motorcycle and delight in God’s creations. It’s freeing and fabulous. And it’ll make you forget all the annoying stuff in your life, if only for a few minutes.

Long Time No Write

2006-10-05T22:17:00.000-05:00

The last few months have been a crazy ride, and I’m still trying to adjust to my new hectic schedule. I started two new jobs, a church group, a different church, and the process of getting my first book out on the shelves. Hopefully blogging will once again make the priority list. Right after trying to remember everyone’s names that I have recently met. :)

In regards to my book, I received my first batch of edits yesterday. They came earlier than anticipated, and despite being excited about the prospect of improving my book, nervousness impaled my innards during the five (loooong) seconds it took my computer to open the word document. Minor adjustments, people. Minor?!? Surprised, delighted, disappointed, delighted, confused, delighted. I wish I could say I ended with being delighted, but my mixed feelings preferred to cause turmoil and wreak havoc on their host.

But I digress. The point of this blog was just to let you all know that…I’M BACK! Inevitably, with more randomness than necessary.

Concerts Galore

2006-08-03T15:21:00.000-05:00

I love live music, but residing in the fascinating and culture rich city of Topeka, Kansas, does have its disadvantages. *partially dripping in sarcasm* So, any chance an artist I like plays close, I try to attend. Last week, I fit in three concerts for a mere $10.

First off was Faith Hill and Tim McGraw on their Soul2Soul Tour. Hmmm...unexpectedly boring. The problem could have been that I was so far away that I had to look at the giant screen to discern Faith from her back up singers. But, alas, the seats were free, so we left them early and beat the crowd out of the arena (and before we suffered irreparable nose bleeds).

Secondly was Kelly Clarkson. We were blessed with a gorgeous evening of near perfect temperatures. Her music is fantastic but her stage presence is lacking in entertainment. Good thing this was free too, or I would have been severely disappointed after her 45 minute set ended abruptly and we were forced to head home before the sun set. (Now, if Graham Colton was still opening for her, my opinion of the concert in its entirety would be different. :) )

Last, and most definitely not least was the Locash Cowboys. They ROCK--for merely $10! Their original music could use...well, new writers. BUT, if you want to be purely entertained and find yourself losing track of three hours of your life, go see these Nashville "gentle"men. Cute girls be forewarned...

First Book Deal

2006-07-20T15:28:00.000-05:00

Well, today I was offered my first children's book deal. Yippee! It was thrilling to get such great feedback from an editor. However, as I reviewed the contract, there were some definite red flags and questions that I had. So...I'm going to chew on the details for a couple days, ask questions to some of my writer friends, and hopefully by next week I'll know if Cinderella's slipper is a size 8. If not, I'm still thankful for God sending me some (much needed) encouragement.

As a good friend reminded me today: "Sometimes the Lord doesn't give us what we want, but what we need." Amen.

Angel Updates

2006-07-19T10:14:00.000-05:00

Angel is no longer moving. (((WHAT?!?))) Well, they sold their old house in anticpation of relocating, so they are now moving into one, approximately 2 miles from the old abode. Mixed feelings run rampant. I do enjoy the girl, a lot. But I will forever feel terribly guilty if I decide to quit the program. This is something the case managers really needs to warn you about beforehand.

She spent the night with me last weekend. Yes, I caved. But only when I thought she was moving. Oh, and her little brother wanted to come. What? You think I’m that crazy? I picked her up at 7:00 p.m. and two movies, three brownies, and lots of gabbing later, we finally were ready to go to bed. As we were washing our faces and brushing our teeth (despite her pleas that she didn’t have to brush her teeth before bed…yeah right), I noticed that her play makeup bag was next to my real one, her brush was strategically placed next to mine, her shoes were lined up, yup you guessed it, next to mine. We spent the next five minutes making sure everything in her backback found a home comprable to mine. My best friend called it “cute”. I called it “pressure”…not to mess her up more than I help her. Ahh…a taste of the endless stress parents have.

Her birthday was yesterday. I called to see how she was celebrating. She thought they may have a get-together today. “With your friends?” I asked.
“I’m not sure,” she replied, her voice oozing with disapointment.
Changing the subject, and hoping for ideas for the present I haven’t bought yet, I asked, “What do you want to get?”
“A laptop.”
“Wow, anything else?”
“A cell phone or a scooter.”
Yikes…how about anything under $10? I’m on a tight budget. (((Help!)))

Old Friends Rock

2006-07-18T11:16:00.000-05:00

I’ve always been blessed with amazing, true friends, male and female. And, yes, I do believe it is possible for men and women to be best friends. Boundaries are a beautiful thing. When I tell folks now about my relationships with my high school buddies, most shake their head in awe. (Jealous or skeptical? :) ). Most of the cattiness and hatred that seems to pervade schools now (Think Mean Girls) miraculously skipped my class (or perhaps I was too naive to notice it).

As one of my best guy friends was married a couple Saturdays ago, I was once again surrounded by all of my fabulous buddies from back in the day. Our days of old included wasting countless hours swimming, eating, procrastinating homework, driving around, and living a relatively carefree life. Two hours into the reception, when my cheeks ached and belly was strained from excessive giggling, I was once again reminded of what we had and never failed to take for granted. In an effort to reclaim lost feelings, here is my list of why old friends are the best.

-You never have to make small talk
-Inside jokes
-The only hand shakes used are the elaborate ones made up in junior high, and sadly you still remember them
-All the stupid mistakes made are now fodder for poking fun
-Time passed between visits is irrelevant
-No pretenses allowed
-Any silence is inevitably broken by “Remember that time when…”
-Their parents are now your friends too
-They are the family you’d choose to have
-Blatant honesty, whether you want it or not
-Unconditional love and forgiveness

2 Weeks Left

2006-07-05T13:14:00.000-05:00

To end the panic I am sure all two of you are feeling about my last post...it was the B and F combination that oddly lent to a delightfully entertaining evening. I fondly remember the night as a high school reunion with only the people that I really wanted to see.

I just received word that it is now legal to have overnights with our littles. As much as I'm a fan of what the Big Brothers, Big Sisters program represents and accomplishes, I still cannot figure out why they would want to torture their adult volunteers like this. Angel has been counting down the days for months like it's Christmas, and her grandmother has mentioned it no less than the last ten times I have dropped her off at home.

Let's put this into perspective, shall we? I'm not a mother and my youngest sibling is 26. Therefore, I do not store toys, kid movies, or anything even remotely entertaining at my house. And while I understand that shattering lamps, crystal vases, and my Irish pottery can be thoroughly amusing, no one wants to see the evil side of me emerge. Trust me. (There are no witnesses...)

So how do I entertain an 8 year old, who never sleeps the night through (and I thoroughly enjoy 8-10 hours of blissful uninteruption on the weekends), for an entire night?? Come on BB/BS, give me some ideas or rescue me!! Or how about abolishing this ridiculous rule? Seems fair to me. But alas, she is moving to Arizona in 2 weeks, so I suppose it's possible I cave. Just call me the dream giver. Okay, now I feel bad. Great, we'll probably have two slumber parties now, just to make up for my sarcasm.

I'll be tired and grouchy for the next 2 weeks. From the slumber parties, of course...not from her moving away. Right.

Another One Bites The Dust

2006-07-03T10:21:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm going to throw the truth out like I just did my breakfast leftovers. I hate weddings. For many reasons, of which I'll spare you the details. Phew, speaking the truth is thoroughly cleansing. Any valid excuse and I decline attendance. However, I readily admit this past Saturday was perhaps the lone exception to the rule.

How is that possible?

A) The hottest man in the room was on my arm
B) I witnessed a random streaking incident
C) My dance lessons paid off and I showed off all night
D) The maid of honor tripped walking up the aisle
E) I secretly tied the knot
F) I ran into an ex-boyfriend or four
G) I'm a sucker for bubbles

No Phone Home

2006-06-26T19:25:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I abhor wasting time by making multiple trips when something can be feasibly accomplished in one. For example, after getting groceries, I only want to make one trip from my car to the house no matter how many plastic bags line my trunk. Despite the fact that this routinely leads to deep gouges up my arms and telling scratches along my entry hall wall. We all have our quirks...don't judge. :)

Yesterday afternoon, I was working outside, but once my rear became numb from sitting on concrete, I decided it would prudent to make use of a comfy chair situated in the window. So I loaded up my books, notebooks, pens, drink, and cell phone, and cautiously opened the door. All was well, until the back swing, when my cell phone took flight and crashed into the Italian marble flooring. (Well...it's really tile, but marble sounds way more posh.)

As I rescued my baby, and only form of communication with the outside world (besides email and blogging, of course), I realized it was only in two pieces. Not bad...phone and battery. Easy enough to fix. Well, not when you break the clasps and the battery no longer attaches. After almost having a panic attack, I immediately embarked on a mission to the cell phone store. Waited in line only to find out they just sold the last battery. Rats! But they were kind of enough to tell me about another store specializing in only batteries. Again, no luck. I'll spare you the minute details, but after strike three and ten dollars in gas, I hit the jack pot. No, I didn't get the battery for free as I was secretly praying for, but a fine gentlemen scotch taped the battery to my phone. Brilliant (in my best British accent).

So now it's back in action for mere pennies...but I have this mysterious rash from where the tape is rubbing on my jaw. If only I had a picture of this trashy, I mean trendy, contraption to share...

World Famous? Nah

2006-06-26T12:41:00.000-05:00

I daresay it's time the Topeka Zoo remove the "World Famous" moniker...

While this has been a passing thought over the years, I hadn't scoped birds there since my last field trip in the fifth grade, so I didn't feel qualified to make the final declaration. But considering it was BBQ at the Zoo on Saturday (free food, my friends), I decided to take Angel for a little look-see. I was scammed by grandma into taking her little brother too.

So hand-in-hand we stalked tigers, peered at monkeys, and nuzzled lions (albeit a dead one). Realistically, we could have seen everything in the zoo in under thirty minutes, even dodging oversized strollers and wandering kids. Very few exotic animals are left on the premises and the ones in the cages looked bored and beaten into a sad existence, like Picasso forced to crunch numbers in a cubicle 24 hours a day.

Now, let's get something clear--I'm not a zoo expert. But I doubt I'd drive across town to see this zoo again, let alone come from Zimbabwe or Namibia. So how about being a bit more realistic and changing the name to "The Topeka Zoo--It's All We Got" or "The Locally Abstained from Topeka Zoo"? Ah, yes, my marketing professors would be proud.

7 Benefits

2006-06-14T22:20:00.000-05:00

My pastor shared the seven benefits Paul told us we received once we were saved and I thought I'd list them here, so we can all celebrate together! :) (All verses KJV)

1) We have peace with God: "Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ." Romans 5:1

2) We have access to God: "By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand..." Romans 5:2

3) We have hope in life: "...and rejoice in hope of the glory of God." Romans 5:2

4) Our problems have a purpose: "And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience, and experience, hope." Romans 5:3-4

5) We have the Holy Spirit: "And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us." Romans 5:5

6) We are loved: "For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:6-8

7) We have eternal security: "Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him." Romans 5:9

Random Thought

2006-06-14T22:12:00.000-05:00

I went for a walk the other day and saw a young girl, around eight years old, riding her pink two-wheeled bike along the sidewalk across the street from me. Her long, blonde hair was flowing behind her, and she had a matching pink backpack strapped across her back. She was strolling gracefully along the path, in no hurry.

Like a speeding bullet, a boy, probably 12, came barreling behind her, screaming as he almost rubbed her tires with his own. She was so startled, she yelled in horror, and jumped off her bike, landing in the grass. He gleefully rode past her, snickering, while a devilish smile split his face in two.

So what did I think of? How often do we let someone come up behind us and scare us off course? Did he really mean her harm? No, he just wanted to get a reaction out of her and take her place in the lead. She could have sped up and joined in the race, but instead she stopped and gave him the clear lead without putting up a fight. She gave up too easily. When have we done the same, letting some tiny setback throw us off course? Let's get back on the bike and win the race.

Cleaning House

2006-06-14T21:48:00.000-05:00

Monday was spent delving through all of my grandmother's possessions. Dividing every material good into piles bound for charity, auction, or the trash bin. This was the first time I have ever gone through someone's personal effects, and I found it extremely interesting.

What was important to her? The antique sewing machine or the latest trendy plate from the mall? Her wedding picture or the closets full of Christmas decorations? How do I remember her?

It made me stop and consider my own house (and life). What would people discover if they looked through my belongings? Would my love for my family, friends, and people in general be evident, or would it look like I spent all of my life holed up reading books? How do I want people to remember me? Maybe it's time I clear out the clutter in my life and house and get back to the basics of what is really important...before it's too late.

Grandmother

2006-06-08T11:16:00.000-05:00

My grandmother passed away last week and is now living her real life in heaven. She struggled through the past year, battling cancer, blood clots, head trauma, and knee surgery. A stark contrast to her now glorified, pain-free existence.

I was asked to write a poem to read at her funeral. I also talked about her life, legacy, and her future, but I will only post the poem here. She signed all of our birthday/Christmas cards with her trademark XXXOOO. As we were sorting through her paperwork earlier this week, I found a birthday card she had written to me in March (my birthday is in November). Her final XXXOOO sent my way, until we meet again. (Interesting, considering the title of my tribute poem.)

XXX
OOO
From Heaven’s Angel of Cards

In Corning, 1930, her first breaths were taken,
She grew into a woman, too tough to be shaken.

A Lillis native, then on to Frankfort, her primary residence,
With two brothers, sisters, niece, and Ed and Vera, her parents.

To giving quarters to the quietest grandkid in the car,
Or spending every waking moment down at the bar.

Is how we remember her, healthy and whole,
An exceptional woman with a lovely soul.

Though her life paths were treacherous and the journey was involved,
It molded her into a woman of admirable courage and willful resolve.

The sands of time surrounded her for seventy-five years,
Polishing her astounding character to become shiny and clear.

The extra time God gave us, allowed us to say our goodbyes,
Though we know He was calling her home, to heaven on high.

We longed for a few more good weeks, to make her dreams come true.
A trip to Vegas and one more KU game to cheer the red and blue.

Our hearts are heavy-laden, but we will always remember her impact on our lives.
Her generosity and love, and to be a fighter like her, may we always strive.

Longing to hear her wisdom and the sound of her voice, we may dial 4272,
But she will not answer, so we’ll send our messages to heaven, care of you.

As her daughter brushed away her final stream of tears and professed her love,
Those mementos of misery were laid to rest, while her spirit soared above.

Her family has not lived without her presence for even a day,
Knowing she’s gone leaves a gaping hole in every way.

We can’t seem to fathom life without her here.
Help us, Lord, to celebrate her life and keep her memories near.

But God welcomed her home with an amazing party and feast.
And sang her an original song that rang from heaven’s west to east.

He danced with her in fields full of colors we’ve never seen in any story,
But with every breath we will miss her until our reunion in heaven’s glory.

Pet Peeves

2006-05-25T12:43:00.000-05:00

First of all... SOUL PATROL, baby! :)

**********

We all have them...those things that drives us bonkers or make us want to climb under the covers and hide. Whistling inside a car or saying "anyways" are a few of mine. Perhaps these bother you as well, or maybe not. After all, they are my pet peeves. But I'm sure you have a few of your own.

A bit of history on the phrase: "Peeve" comes from the 14th-century word pevish, meaning ornery or ill-tempered. The first time "pet peeve" was used in print was 1911, meaning a minor annoyance that can instill extreme frustration in a person. You're telling me! :)

After grocery shopping this morning at the local Wal-Mart, I returned to my vehicle to unload my basket full of various produce and goods. In the empty car stall next to mine, a lone cart sat, just waiting for a gusty Kansas wind to flail it into the black Ford Explorer downwind. Being a good citizen, I returned it to the appropriate stall along with mine.

As I exited the parking lot, ready to turn down a steep hill, I idled behind a beige indiscriminate SUV, when out of nowhere a flying, blue, plastic basket barrelled its way down the busy intersection. Vehicles dogded left and right, running and gunning to narrowly avoid the path of destruction coursed by the runaway Wal-Mart cart. After several tense seconds of praying the cart wouldn't stray toward me...it finally came to rest against a curb.

If I hadn't spent those precious seconds putting away the first cart, I would have been in the direct line of fire of that torpedo.

I have a new pet peeve. What are yours?

Flat Tire

2006-05-22T14:52:00.000-05:00

Nothing like a flat tire on the way to visit extended family to complete the weekend, huh? As my family was traveling to my twin cousins' high school graduation on Saturday, one of the tires on my parent's SUV decided it was too tired to continue the journey, and solidified its case by quickly relinquishing its air.

Things to be thankful for in the middle of a stressful situation:

Daylight
Safe place to pull over
3 men
Full-sized spare
Towels to keep slacks clean
Wet wipes to wash hands
Time

I love experiencing God's faithfulness.

A Trail of Kindness

2006-05-18T10:57:00.000-05:00

Is anybody happier
Because you passed his way?
Does anyone remember
That you spoke to him today?
This day is almost over,
And its toiling time is through;
Is there anyone to utter now
A friendly word for you?
Can you say tonight in passing
With the days that slipped so fast,
That you helped a single person,
Of the many that you passed?
Is a single heart rejoicing
Over what you did or said?
Does one whose hopes were fading
Now with courage look ahead?
Did you waste the day, or lose it?
Was it well or poorly spent?
Did you leave a trail of kindness
Or a scar of discontent?
~Anonymous~

Pouring Rain and Mercy

2006-05-03T17:33:00.000-05:00

As the old saying goes, "when it rains, it pours." I want to deny this tendency, but as it epitomizes my life of late, the cliché once again proves itself real. My natural tendencies asked me to list each of my problems and for you to listen attentively, as my therapist, mentor, and/or friend. (Thank you in advance for saving me thousands of dollars and countless lunch hours on a couch.)

But alas, after the many ups and downs over the past few days, I finally uncovered the thread of grace stabilizing each of my issues. Selfishly, I could wonder why I had to go through this or that, but instead I will choose to see God's deliverance. Whether it was filling me with peace about the future of a sick loved one or miraculously fixing my dead-in-the-water laptop, He never abandoned me, but continuously poured his grace upon me.

Can I say that I gave Him all the faith He deserved? Can I say I warranted His help? Can I say I never got upset or worried? I wish. But praise God for His patience, love, grace, and mercy, in the middle of any storm. All the attributes I need. Hmm…a correlation perhaps?

Covered in Feathers?

2006-04-25T12:13:00.000-05:00

(Psalm 91:4 NLT) "...He will shelter you with his feathers..."

Huh? What kind of sheltering can God do with feathers? That was my question to Him this morning, during my daily reading. This verse jumped off the page and lodged itself in my muddled brain, begging for clarification. I know God can do anything He wants, but why would He choose to use feathers?

My trains (yes, I mean multiple) of thought while searching for clarification:

Feathers...soft, inviting, definitely not something I would choose to make a shelter out of, especially if there are any rocks or wood lying around.
Is this related to God's character?
Maybe a different translation will help.
God bless America, where I can have several translations at my disposal on my nightstand without persecution.
"He will cover you with his feathers..." (NIV)
Cover, shelter, cover, shelter
Like the blood of Christ covers our sins?
Hmm...back to feathers
I know ostriches were pursued for their feathers, to be used for headdresses and shield ornaments.
So they must be beautiful.
Last I checked the "world famous" Topeka Zoo didn't have any ostriches, so I can't vouch.
People are drawn to beautiful things.
But what about, oh, say, eagle feathers?
I found a quote from Pliny (who was 10 when Jesus was crucified) that said eagle feathers were so powerful that if laid with any other, the eagle feathers would devour and consume all the rest.
So God rescues us from our troubles (taken from the previous verse), devours the sin in our lives, leaving us covered in His beauty. Now that is cool. Cover me with your feathers, Lord!

Chew on this and let me know if He reveals anything different to you.

Name of Jesus Concert

2006-04-24T12:39:00.000-05:00

Last night, Jason Morant, Nate Sallie, Big Daddy Weave, and The Todd Agnew Band graced Wichita's presence with an intense concert. I was blessed to be able to attend, with full access passes, and quite possibly the best seat in the house. This refreshing concert is not about those men, but about coming together to worship God, as they will continually remind you.

JMo is gifted with both a beautiful voice and spirit. Chatting with him only epitomized his graciousness, humbleness, and friendly personality. He's so "Lovely" he needs to be headlining his own tour. (Picture upper left)

Nate Sallie--wow--that man can blast and is full of the "Holy Spirit." He was energetic and involved the crowd. Nate, I'm ruined.

BDW--love them. They were so much fun to watch and really know how to entertain an audience. I spoke with Mike a couple times. If I had to tour, I would want them along for the ride as they know who they are truly performing for--an "Audience of One."

The Todd Agnew band. I can't mention this group without first talking about Jonathan Chu. This talented and gracious young man, knows how to worship with his violin. He worked hard all night as the stage hand, gave an incredibly vivid performance, and still found time to talk to me several times. Todd is intense, insightful, and intelligent. His transparency and down-to-earth talks were heart rending, surprisingly humorous, and necessary. His music never fails to touch me, and seeing him perform live is even more wrenching. You will walk away desiring to be more like "My Jesus." (Picture upper right)

As the concert came to a close, I dreaded the final note Todd would wail. But it made me intensely long for the day where I will be able to worship for eternity, without having to stop and drive 3 hours through a Kansas springtime storm to arrive home in the wee hours of the morning. Oh, and maybe there I'll be able to carry a tune. :)

Impossible to walk away untouched, unmoved, or unchanged. "Be The Moon." If you don't know what that means...you need to go to the concert. You won't be disappointed.

Judging 4N6

2006-04-21T20:32:00.000-05:00

This afternoon brought back fresh memories of experimenting with my acting chops: the sick feeling I never failed to get right before performing, doing everything in my power to impress the panel of judges piercingly staring at my every move, and rejoicing when I placed first. The National Forensics League competition for Kansas was today, and I was recruited by my former coach to judge Dramatic Interpretation and Humorous Interpretation. My specialty, oh so long ago, was Duo Interpretation. It was exciting to meet up with a couple of my fellow forensic friends and catch up on where our separate roads have led. Amazing how easy it is to lose touch. Anyhow, here are a couple of my comments:

It is not necessary to incessantly scream (especially in a small classroom) for extra emphasis. Voice inflection and facial expressions, my dear, are equally powerful. And saves the judges at least four Advil.
Chocolate (or unmarked bills) is the only acceptable form of bribery. Crying does not help.
As a Christian, I try not to judge people. Isn't it fun when society finds a way to make sin acceptable?
According to the leaflet, Dramatic Interp is supposed to make me cry...oh what, I'm sorry. I must have dozed off.
As a contestant, you are not entitled to be bossy. Cockiness leads to ten minutes of me hearing blah, blah, blah, last place.

Uh oh, I think I'm supposed to learn some life lessons from this. I hate when that happens.

Angel's Picnic Fiasco

2006-04-19T13:02:00.000-05:00

What does watching a child eat five chocolate chip cookies and a plate full of cheetos at a picnic get you?

1. Ten minutes of relaxation between swinging, playing catch, screaming, and climbing jungle gyms.

2. The end to five minutes of pouting because BBQ briscuit just isn't up to par with a hamburger and ketchup. (I'll spare you the details on the lack of Gatorade issue)

3. A sugar high that peaks during the awards ceremony. Restraints, anyone?

4. Ten sticky, orange fingers. I've never seen anyone attack a plate of cheetos with both hands before. Next car purchase...leather seats.

5. The inevitable upset tummy on the ride home. (Easter baskets can be used for a variety of purposes)

6. Hopefully her grandma felt the benefits of the sugar crash. I didn't stick around to find out.

Back to Name Dropping

2006-04-17T20:47:00.000-05:00

So I promised more name dropping...today I will finally deliver. My major morning track at the conference was taught by none other than David Kopp. He wrote some of my favorite books including The Prayer of Jabez and The Dream Giver. I also purchased his latest, Roar. I recommend this beautifully illustrated book if you have any children interested in The Chronicles of Narnia. It's basically a work/guide book in association with Narnia.

I met Brandilyn Collins by accident at a fiction writer's breakfast. I really don't belong to that group, but they kindly invited me due to my association with my mentor, Julie Carobini. Julie has a book, Chocolate Beach, coming out in 2007, as well.

Kay Strom was one of the key note speakers, and I bought her Daughters of Hope book. I had the opportunity to speak with her for a minute. A truly lovely lady who sheds new light on the state of Christian women across the world. I had no idea torture and persecution still existed, let alone to the levels that prevail many cultures. This book will open your eyes and make you realize how blessed we are as Americans and challenge you to make a difference.

There are too many others to list here, but I must give a shout out to my incredible roommate, Tasra Dawson. She is self-publishing her first book this fall, so I wish her all the best in that venture!

Easter Prayer

2006-04-15T21:59:00.000-05:00

I was nominated to give the prayer before Easter dinner tomorrow so I thought I would share it with you, as well. May you all have a blessed holiday with your family and friends celebrating the life of our Risen Savior.

God, we love you.
We recognize that Easter symbolizes your infinite mercies and the ultimate sacrifice...for us. Today, as our family gathers together in fellowship, we celebrate that your son, and our savior, is risen, and give thanks to Him for opening the gate to everlasting life.
May we always keep near the cross.
We have peace, for you forgive and forget our trespasses. Purpose, for you direct our steps. Joy, for you triumph over evil. Love, because the Holy Spirit resides in our hearts, and hope, as you promise to come again and take us home.
May we always give thanks.
Lord God, holidays are a great reprieve to stop our busy schedules and honor you, but we also want to know more of you in our everyday lives. We yearn to experience your spirit leading us to growth in our faith and we long for you to flood every aspect of our existence with your glory and love.
May we always desire to know you more.
Thank you for this tangible reminder that Jesus sacrificed His life for us, prevailed over both death and sin, and will forever reign at your side.
May we never forget.
In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen.

Back in Action

2006-04-13T18:46:00.000-05:00

I am back, and almost fully recovered from a week long conference. It was an amazing, but exhausting, experience being surrounded by 400 like-minded people. I learned far more than my mortal brain can retain, but hopefully the most important stuff has sunk in. I've finally shuffled through most of my email backlog and caught up on my sleep, so tomorrow it will be back to some serious work! My to-do list grew substantially...and I love every second of it.

Phil Callaway was the keynote speaker for the week. This man made me laugh and cry at the same time, or was it laugh so hard, I cried? Both, actually. Talk about a man humbly fulfilling his purpose and glorifying his maker. Unbelievable. I highly recommend getting one his books. I purchased Laughing Matters (autographed, of course), so I'll let you know if it lives up to the hype I created.

I'll continue name dropping...tomorrow...

On Getting Older...

2006-04-05T22:08:00.000-05:00

First it was being called ma'am at the grocery store, then the new car insurance discount, and now it's those pesky crow's feet. I am, of course, referring to the little reminders that I am getting older. Everyday I look at my face and say, well, it's not going to get any younger, so I might as well start to like it. I'll keep you posted on how that one turns out.

But this evening, I had a very pleasant surprise, that in truth made my whole week bearable. I usually try to avoid answering the door to anyone who looks like anything remotely like a door-to-door salesman. I have a hard time turning people down, feeling guilty for not buying fifteen magazines I'd never get around to reading anyhow, just so some kid could try to win a trip to Hawaii. I digress, as I did open the door this time.

The first words out of this "miracle cleaner" salesman were, "Are your parents home?" I was literally stunned speechless. I could feel a cheesy smile plaster across my face, and I'm sure this guy was wondering what kind of nutso he happened upon. I just hope I didn't have anything stuck between my front teeth, because I was too blinded by bliss to take any care. I eventually managed to squeak out a "No." Then he took off his sunglasses, took a better look, and apologized profusely. Are you kidding me? Just for saying that, come on in, mister, and sell me some of that cleaner. If only it could erase these wrinkles...

Oh wow, I just thought of something. Do they teach that tactic in salesmanship school? If not, they should. Oh well, I'm taking the compliment and sticking it into my pocket for a rainy day.

Anyone, or perhaps your parents, want some miracle cleaner?

Band-Aids

2006-04-03T18:28:00.000-05:00

I took Angel to my parent's house on Saturday. They were planning to spend the beautiful afternoon working in the yard and Angel loves playing with the dogs. Their back fence is lined with huge evergreen (I think) trees, and the ground below them is covered with the dead needles that have fallen off over the winter.

Angel decided to build her own garden in the needles. To start with, she wanted gloves, but none of the five pairs my mom produced were good enough. And needless to say, every tool, flower pot, weed, and piece of yard art was succintly moved to her area. She even hung a welcome sign.

After some coaxing, she managed to coerce my mom into going feather hunting with her. (Kobe, my mom's dog, and I declined as we were quite comfortable lounging in the shady grass) So they crawled around in the needles, dodging the low branches, and surprisingly found a lot of feathers. But unfortunately, something happened to Angel's hand. We took her inside to examine her mysterious pains. Nothing was visible to my naked eye, but for the sake of peace, I rubbed some ointment on her hand and my mom put a large net-like bandage around her hand and secured it with tape.

Now that everything was in perfect working order, she proceeded to go work on her garden again. Approximately three minutes later, she acquired the same wound on her other hand. I ushered her back inside and gave her the same ministrations as the other hand. Well, almost. She was quick to point out that my mom put three circles of tape around her hand, while I had done only one. Then she asked how many days should she keep the bandages on for. A month, at least. :)

When I took her home, she wanted me to tell her grandma what happened to her hands. And per grandma's rules, those darn feathers never even made it inside.

My mom invited her back to help during planting season, promising her new gloves. I'm buying stock in Band-Aids.

Driving Miss Tobias and Mr Kobe

2006-03-29T22:01:00.000-06:00

It even smelled like spring today. The sun shone brightly and a strong breeze blew in warm temperatures. Despite being a cold weather girl, I couldn’t help but want to spend as much time as possible outdoors.

During high school, rain or shine, my friends and I would take long drives through the countryside to relax or wind down after a stressful event. We grew up in a small town surrounded by both beautiful rolling hills and flat farmland. After meeting a tough deadline yesterday, I have needed something to help me relax and refocus to gear up on other projects. Why not resort to a tried and true method?

With it being Wednesday, I had dog duty, watching my dog, Tobias, and my mom’s, Kobe, at my parent’s house. They are a Yorkie and Bichon respectively. Not wanting to leave them out of the fun, I invited them along for the ride. As I opened the front door of the house, amidst stern warnings to get right into my car, they raced down to the corner as fast as their little legs would carry them, only stopping when they found a suitable place to go to the bathroom.

Standing at my car door, and looking quite ridiculous, I holler, plead, beg, yell, threaten, and bribe until they deem me worthy enough to listen to. While the neighbor smirks, I finally toss them into my car. I crank up the radio, open the sunroof, and roll down the windows. I pull out of the driveway as the two rambunctious brats fight for position on my lap to stick their heads out the window. With my vision and arm movements severely impaired, I narrowly avoid missing the trashcans, but hey, we were on our way. As for the rest of the story, well let’s just say…the next time I try this adventure I must remember:

To take a pillow to cover my legs to protect them from toenail punctures
Never have more animals than I have free hands while driving
Dogs are vacuums of food, but otherwise leave a trail of mess
There’s no point in washing windows when you have a dog
Kisses do not make up for five minutes of whining in your ear
Curves, lovely in some places, not so good when the dog at your feet steps on the gas pedal for you
Trade my car in for an automatic (my transmission can be found three miles north)
Leashes!!!!
Cows…the smell of money?? The smell of something all right…
Naps are a valid alternative...just ask Tobias and Kobe…well, when they wake up. Glad to know the drive relaxed them enough for a nap.

Used Books

2006-03-24T21:05:00.000-06:00

My mother and I made the trek to the big city (i.e. Kansas City) today. She had an appointment and I was along for the ride, well, really for the excuse to peruse the used book stores along the route. There is nothing like being surrounded by beautifully bound and crafted literary insights. Losing myself in mountains of books is the ultimate stress reliever. Perhaps that's why my bedroom looks like a tornado-tossed library. :) In Lawrence we hit up a couple, and in Kansas City we found another duo plus the obligatory Barnes and Noble.

We found walls and walls of mysteries, romance novels, fiction, non-fiction, etc., but I was on the hunt for some Ted Dekker, Thomas A Kempis, and Elizabeth Elliott, to name a few. The religious sections seemed much smaller than many of the other displays and I was time and again disappointed in the selections.

Perhaps Christians like to hang onto their books instead of selling them back. While that says a lot for the quality of books we are reading, it makes it hard on us bargain hunters.

So, if any of you know of any good used book stores where I won't be disappointed, please let me know. I am no longer allowed to explore with my mom. :)

Despite my disappointment, I still came home with five new babies. Onto the dresser they go. Oh no, where does this put Narnia? Decisions, decisions.

Narnia

2006-03-22T20:48:00.000-06:00

As usual, I am several months behind on seeing the latest movie releases. So Angel and I went to see Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe this evening. Barring the bathroom trips and crying kids, it was incredible! Actually, having an acceptable movie that children can attend and see Jesus's sacrifice, among other things, in a different context was well worth the distractions. The book is on my nightstand buried with forty others lined up to read, so I wasn't exactly sure what to expect. But the parallels with Christianity were very cool. I need to see it again, as I'm sure I missed a lot.

My favorites:
Lucy...I could not stop thinking about her. She mirrors so many of Jesus's traits...her unfailing love, easy forgiveness, blind faith, and ability to know her gifts and to use them without hesitation.

Edmond...I felt like he really didn't fit in with his other siblings. Sure they loved him, but he was more difficult to understand. He refused to listen to authority and always went his own way, which almost cost him his life. Aslan had to send his men to rescue him, and ultimately gave his own life for Edmond's mistakes. Sound familiar? I know it does to me.

Susan...she didn't want to leave her comfort zone. She wasn't ready for the adventure because they didn't have warm clothes or any food to eat. She wanted to go back to where it was safe. But had she followed her instincts, she would have missed out on the journey of a lifetime. Yup, this one is familiar too.

Peter lead his army into battle and they fought with creativity. They used everything at their disposal (ex: birds dropping rocks, and spreading fire) against the basic brute force of the enemy. It reminded me how our God is infinitely creative. Despite the downfalls of each of the kids, Aslan was able to use them for greatness.

As amazing as it would be to be called to be a queen or king, keep in mind there are a lot of vessels who have to do their part. Without all the soldiers, they never would have won this battle, no matter how strong the kids were. We all have a part to play, big or small.

Aslan...I knew he would come back alive, but my heart still ached seeing him walk toward his awaited humiliation and torturous death. But when he awoke and ROARED, chills racked my body. I stood up on the inside and thought, that is our savior, our hero. "Not tame, but he is good."

The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe has jumped to the top of my stack.

Parade Insights

2006-03-17T14:54:00.000-06:00

Yes, I admit it, I used Angel as my excuse to go to the local St. Patty's Day parade today. But I consider that a fringe benefit to being a Big Sister. Overall, it was enjoyable (at least I wasn't the one wearing a kilt) and Angel was able to take home a ton of candy, beaded necklaces, a bracelet, business cards, a balloon, flyers, a mouse pad, and probably some other crazy things I've already forgotten. The last time I went to a parade, I was ecstatic for stale tootsie rolls and maybe a piece of bubble gum.

Well, it was made blatantly obvious that I am not yet a mother...as I seemingly was the only person to have forgotten a bag (let alone a green hat or other festive sack) to put all the goodies into...and to be quite honest, the thought never even crossed my mind until both of my hands were filled. Fortunately, it was a wee bit cold, and my coat had two big pockets, both of which ended up being filled to the brim. Where did I put my hands? Not sure, I couldn't feel them until I got home.

While Angel was on the front lines battling the other children for handouts, I had the following observations:

No matter how hard you try and keep your kids or yourselves away from second hand smoke, there will always be somebody who thinks it's okay to butt themselves to the front, dropping ashes and leaving puffs of smoke in their wake
The persistent and agressive get more candy
While you're looking at the ground for scraps, you may miss the best to come
The most rewarding part is seeing a child's eyes light up when you hand them a piece of your candy
Wear sunglasses if you value your sight (even if it's cloudy) -- the trajectory from a float to the ground, when a high school boy is throwing out the candy can be real dangerous
No matter what, a rainbow is still the symbol of God's promise
We've taught our kids to raise their hands for treats, but have we shown them how to lift their hands in praise of the only one truly worthy of it?

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!

Hope you didn't get pinched!

Words

2006-03-13T16:56:00.000-06:00

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." We've all heard that mantra and even possibly used it to try and deflect the impact of the hurtful words being shouted at us from the neighborhood bully, or as we age, from a boss who must have forgotten the third grade lesson on respecting others.

Words are extremely important in our lives. They are how we communicate with friends, family, business associates, or even enemies. And in this internet age, the written word has become even more important in keeping in touch with current events or people around the world.

There are two outcomes when we speak with others: we either build them up or tear them down. Which one will you choose? One of my favorite bible verses, Proverbs 25:11 (NIV) says: "A word aptly spoken, is like apples of gold in setting of silver." God values words spoken in encouragement and honesty.

I received an unexpected email today containing four words. An encouragement, a delight, a corner stone to help me through the day and to continue to toil on even when the road seems full of brush. Did this person have any idea of the impact of his four tiny words? Probably not. But that is the pure, simplistic beauty of it. God will do more than you can imagine with a mere "good job", "atta boy", or "I'm proud of you" than you ever thought possible. Let God use your mouth to spread His love, and watch as lives are changed, and brush is cleared.

Challenge for today (the boomerang effect): Let not your tongue spew evilness, but use it to lift others up and encourage them in their walk. And I just bet you will blessed in return.

On our Own

2006-03-10T17:03:00.000-06:00

You are teaching your child to ride a bike and the first time you let go, you see him teetering precariously and you desperately want to run after him, to make sure he doesn't fall off and hurt himself. But something holds you back. Innately, you know he has to learn to ride the bike on his own. Your hand cannot be on the back of the seat for his entire life, despite being a champion marathon runner. Personally, I would make it a block and then have to bribe my kid with ice cream to go back inside. Give me a break...it's hot in the summer!

Have you ever seen a friend or loved one make a huge mistake? Perhaps you've seen your best friend stay in an unhealthy relationship or you see your child tempted to drink at a high school party. All of us are well aware of temptation and the desires we have to do sinful acts. None of us are immune, and at some point we will all succumb.

I believe that for every sinful act we commit, there will be consequences. (i.e. we reap what we sow) I've often wondered what it would be like if we could suffer the consequences of someone else's sin. What parent wouldn't take the pain of their child's scraped knee? What husband wouldn't take the blame for something he led the family to do? Why doesn't the person who tempts us to commit the sin get double the consequences?

But Deuteronomy 24:16 (KJV) says: "The fathers shall not be put to death for the children, neither shall the children be put to death for the fathers: every man shall be put to death for his own sin".

There we have it. End of discussion. It is up to us, individually, to choose what activities we partake in. No matter how hard the temptation was, or what the motivation behind the act was, we will not escape the consequences.

My advice? Have band-aids, disinfectant, and a loving kiss ready at all times. We all will fall off the bike and need some help back up.

Saying No

2006-03-09T18:57:00.000-06:00

When is it okay to say no? How do you know if you are being selfish or unkind? When is it okay to put your needs in front of others? As women, we continuously give of ourselves to our families, friends, careers, volunteer organizations, church, etc. But there are times when we just have to draw the line, right? Are people pleasers the only ones who deal with these type of questions?

Today, my case manager for the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program called today to both set up my three month evaluation and to make sure I was putting together a team for the bowlathon. First of all, I abhor bowling. I love recreation and sporting activities, but I just do not find bowling enjoyable. I would also have to recruit four other people who would be willing to raise a bunch of money (another of my least favorite activities). I have a conference coming up that is very important to me as well as a business to run and all of my other personal obligations to meet. Excuses, I know. But do all of those go on the back burner to meet someone elses needs? What does God want me to do?

Am I a bad person if I don't put together a team? Probably. Should I put together a team? Probably. Am I letting others down if I don't? Probably. But I can't make everyone happy. For once, I think this people pleaser is going to have to say no.

Big Sister

2006-03-08T23:06:00.000-06:00

I recently made some major changes in my life. For one, I became a Big Sister. As in, part of the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program. I am single, with no children. None of my siblings have children and I'm the last person any of my friend's would call to babysit. New mothers cringe when I come bearing gifts to the hospital...praying I don't ask to hold their precious newborn. Come on...even children illiterate people like me don't drop babies...often. :)

So now I find myself in charge of an 8-year old girl, I'll call Angel. Don't take that literally. Since it's my first post, I suppose I best warn you that I can be a bit sarcastic. It's up to you to figure out when. This is our third month together (Angel and myself, not me and you) and I usually have her for a few hours a week, so I am starting to get to know her pretty well.

Tonight, however, was a first. The first time in my life where I have been the one in charge of the crying, obnoxious, peace stealing child who ruins everyones experience at the store, leaving more than a few with a migraine. Yes, Angel threw a temper tantrum in the middle of the Dollar Store because I would not buy her some hideous squishy elephant whose plastic skin gave me the heebee jeebies. Normally, I would be the one in the book section giving dirty looks to the parent unable to control their child, or rolling my eyes at the other shoppers looking around for the culprit. Not to mention making promises to myself that my children will never act like that.

Trust me, I would have put down the $1.07 to get her to shut up, but I had previously promised her grandmother I wouldn't buy her anything, until Angel's therapist cleared the road. (ie she got in trouble and had all her toys taken away) Grandmother's wrath vs Angel' tears...tough one.

Thoughts:
#1: Do 8 year olds really still cry and pout in stores? I thought that ended after the terrible two's?
#2: Is there anyone close by that I can pretend she is with instead of me?
#3: Where is the nearest exit?

Needless to say, I grabbed her hand and took her to my car immediately, amidst promises that I would never take her shopping again. I let her pout back to my house (about a 6 minute drive) then told her that I thought spending time together was more important than buying a squishy elephant. And that all of other times together had been a blast, whether or not we had spent any money. I didn't know if she was buying it or not, so I said, let's skip down the street. By the time we returned to my house, she was all smiles again. And we enjoyed the rest of the evening.

To all you mom's out there...especially the single parents...if I was wearing a hat...it would be taken off to you. I experience two hours of your craziness a week, but now enjoy all the other 166 all the more.

And for any of you adults in a bad mood. Try skipping down the street, hand in hand with a child (borrow one if you have to). It works wonders.

Write Where I Am

A Hero's Cape

Tired

My Rant

Merry Christmas!

Let Freedom Ring

Yea's & Boo's

Football and a Prayer

Addictions

Scorched

3 Not-So-Blind Mice

Giddyup!

Off Sabbatical

Working 9 to 5...

Book Release Parteeeee

LIVE in 5, 4, 3...

Been Awhile...

First *Booked* Event!

Check out my Book Cover!!

Say Cheese!

Get Organized...or Not!

How Much Is Too Much?

New Year, New Start

Christmas Prayer

Waiting...

The Loss of a Presence

Thanksgiving

Raining Babies & Blankets

Boo at the Zoo

Walk the Walk

Let Freedom Ring

Trapped...

Do as You Say Not as You Want

Long Time No Write

Concerts Galore

First Book Deal

Angel Updates

Old Friends Rock

2 Weeks Left

Another One Bites The Dust

No Phone Home

World Famous? Nah

7 Benefits

Random Thought

Cleaning House

Grandmother

Pet Peeves

Flat Tire

A Trail of Kindness

Pouring Rain and Mercy

Covered in Feathers?

Name of Jesus Concert

Judging 4N6

Angel's Picnic Fiasco

Back to Name Dropping

Easter Prayer

Back in Action

On Getting Older...

Band-Aids

Driving Miss Tobias and Mr Kobe

Used Books

Narnia

Parade Insights

Words

On our Own

Saying No

Big Sister

First Booked Event!